Imagine that you wanted to know what kind of husband a certain man is. How might you find out?
This simplest approach might be simply asking him directly. But that would only reveal the kind of husband he thinks he is, or tries to be, or hopes to be.
If you wanted to know what kind of husband he actually is, you would do far better to ask his wife. She is the one who interacts with him on a regular basis. She is the one who experiences him in the role of “husband” day after day, and her perspective is therefore uniquely positioned to assess his efforts.
Put in another way, her perceptions are the true test of whether he is as effective a husband as he thinks he is. And as important as they are in a marriage, perceptions play an equally important role in workplace leadership.
To understand why, think about your own boss. Though she might honestly consider how her decisions affect you and your work, she will never understand their consequences as fully as you do. Her assessment will always be limited, as any leader’s would be.
We human beings can assess the impact of our behavior on others to a degree. Our perceptions, however, are necessarily one-sided. We can strive for impartiality, can do our best to put ourselves in other’s shoes. But such efforts will get us only so far.
A leader’s self-reflection in the workplace, then, must intentionally take into account the views of his or her employees. Just as comedians know that audience reaction is what determines the quality of a joke, leaders must learn that the views of employees—and not their own perceptions—are what determine the quality of workplace dynamics.
You may think you are an approachable supervisor. But if your employees think otherwise, communication will be poor. You may think you treat subordinates equally. But if they perceive favoritism, cohesiveness and teamwork will suffer.
Like the husband mentioned before, you can describe the kind of leader you think you are, or are trying to be, or hope to be. But only your employees can say what kind of a leader you actually are. And if you want to be effective with them, it is their view that must concern you.
Only when self-reflection incorporates the views and perceptions of others, only when we reach beyond the limits of our own beliefs and expectations, can it be said that we have a true reflection of the human system we head and the impact our actions have on it.